Soon? Soon.

Soon I meet my other special twins again. And after that, who knows.

Hospital, therapy, all over again.

But what's the point? I'll always be alone, I'll always be unhappy, I'll always be mad/mental/crazy/loony/nuts/bats in the belfry etc, take your pick.

So why try anymore?

I keep feeling hope but then losing it again.

I keep trying to fight but then getting that fight knocked out of me.

How much longer do I do this? Hasn't it been more than long enough already? Why drag this out any longer? I am too tired so every way, exhausted for so long now. Which is possibpy the only thing stopping me from just leaving. I'm just too tired to even try.

And there is that one person who needs me. That one person who loves me more than anyone. Why? I have no fucking idea. But I can't break a child's heart. I can't risk scarring her for life. How could children ever understand that?

We are best friends forever, twins forever, and will live in her castle together 😊😊

I am still a child in so many, most ways. Stuck in my own head because it's better there than reality. So, what happens now?

I don't know and I really don't even care anymore. Wherever my mind goes from here, let it go. I really don't care.

"There goes my heart...Take it all"